Chicken soup makes me sick.

Lately I have been suffering from the great misfortune of achieving too many of my goals.

It wasn't her looks that attracted me to her.  But she sure didn't like it when I told her so.

Upon meeting each one I felt reassured that there were plenty more to meet.

I have everything I wanted once, but I can't keep the dust off it.

Promise me one thing... that you'll never turn into one of those people we used to make fun of...

And then it occurred to me: why the hell NOT buy a bright orange shirt?

It was such a small act, I never thought it would have any cumulative effect.  I only did it once, every day...

Our relationship would never have been so successful had it not been for alcohol.

I try to always know where my dog, laptop, and motorcycle are... but sometimes it's difficult.

Sure I'll 'add you as my friend'.  But really, are any of us going to be using this in 5 years?

Don't talk to her like you want to date her, talk to her like someone she's dating.

Just think of all the time you'd save...  Just sit there and THINK about it.

It really hurts to be accused of hurting someone.

The weather vane may blow over in the storm, but it faces it head-on.

Age comes without choice, but maturity comes from one's choices.

I commented to my new acquaintance how remarkable it was that the extras in front of us could have such realistic conversations without making a sound - and how that just goes to show how good we all are at pretending to be interested in others.  But I don't think she was really listening.

If you could freeze the world when you wanted more time, which parts of your life would be worth taking it off pause?

Suddenly, all the prices started to fall.  And for some reason, that scared me.

I met someone once who thought his best years were over, and spent his time regretting the mistakes he'd made when he was younger.  He was 10.